Snow is good-soft, deep, drifted snow. Snow is lovely. Remember that you are the pilot and your body is the aircraft. By tilting forward and putting your hands at your side, you can modify your pitch and make progress not just vertically but horizontally as well. As you go down 15,000 feet, you can also go sideways two-thirds of that distance-that’s two miles! Choose your landing zone. You be the boss.

What to do if the plane you are travelling in suffers what the engineers coyly call “catastrophic integrity failure.” Meaning that you’ve suddenly got bigger problems than the yakker in the next seat.

If you keep your wits about you, though, and employ these elementary principles of physics . . . well, you’ll probably end up like a smashed bug anyway.

Yet people have survived falls from a similar or even greater height before. Here’s how they did it.

the blog québécois

These people are being forgotten and I feel I need to speak out for them. I do not understand how this can be interpreted as cruel or unreasonable.

(Dr) Hamish Meldrum, Chairman, BMA council, London WC1

The fact that this fool, the head of the BMA, does not understand why people think its immoral to deny treatment to people because they had the temerity to sort themselves out instead of waiting for the NHS is what is wrong with the NHS. Playing the politics of envy with people’s lives is beneath contempt.

Well my last bit of chemo has been introduced into my body and PICC line is finally out. I am free of chemo (permanently one hopes) and just have to face various tests to make sure the cancer is well and truly gone.

I would like to thank the wonderful staff of both the chemo day unit and the trial I was on; both at North Middlesex Hospital. After Kim’s horrific experience at St Thomas’ I did view the whole thing with a bit of trepidation back in the dark days of January. However, after a few teething problems all round, things went swimmingly. They are truly decent people trying to do a good job in face of the emotion and angst of cancer patients (and quite frankly in some complete and utter disregards for their fellow man).

Stealing stuff in the post from a cancer patient. Its stuff from Amazon and the cancer patient is me. Ordered two things and both have gone missing. The Royal Mail is a bloody disgrace and does not deserve the title Royal. Why does Amazon persist in using the thieving bastards?

Is it so wrong to want a game to play during my heavy week?

On the up side I am not on the antibodies again which is nice. I am still off them to stop my fingers and toes bleeding. Having to type without several fingers getting involved is rather hard.

Oh yeah and one of the programs I ordered was a dictation program so I could continue to write while I am on chemo.

Simply Jews has got a secret picture of me these days.

You might have noticed that I am not being as prolific as I am normally of late. That is because one of the side-affects of the chemo is that the end of my fingers (and toes) are pretty sensitive and prone to cracking/bleeding. Not that it has curtailed that much of my writing as Kim does quite a mean taking dictation. She is able to turn my ramblings into the written word with great aplomb. As a result I am writing a bit less but doing a bit more reviewing.

My transformation into werewolf continues nicely with much of my face now covered with very black and thick hair. Its not soft peach fuzz either, but stiff hair you would find on a dog’s face. They tell me it all goes away once I finish chemo. Shedding this lot will be interesting to experience.

It has inspired some lyrics…

Chemo Wolf

She called me a Full Moon Man
But does she see Im a hairy man

As Zevon sang
Werewolves of London
Are at it again
Trader Vics and all that Jazz
Lee Ho Fooks and all that rocks

Hair on my face
Clear skin not a trace
The Moon is calling me
Calling me to run free

Im a chemo wolf
The poison drew me out
Hair is my proof
A Chemo wolf

My abject latency
Is now in acendancy
Yeah my ole latency
Out of dormancy

My hairy monster side continues. The spots are still there, but many of them are covered by a thin layer of very black hair. Its most amusing I have to say as I am growing hair where I never have before; futhermore I am growing hair where I didn’t think hair every grew. I know we grow to look like our dogs but this is getting rather silly. Can’t wait to hear what the doc has to say about it on Monday.

On the non-hairy side of things I am feeling rather better post-chemo day. Wednesday, whether the heavy or light day, are still a bit of a hit & miss affair being able to function. Last two I have come hope from chemo and promptly passed out. Granted the heavy day I pass out more or less for 12 hours; but still. Its good to know that I am fairly functioning all but two days during the fortnight cycle. It allows us to plan things more accurately.

On Tuesday night we had a rather nice dinner and drinks in London with Dr Lee Rotherham, a primary Conservative candidate for London Mayor and wedding attendee, and he didn’t run away in terror. Course he is in the TA and has probably seen “Dog Soldiers.”

They tell you that you will probably lose your hair when doing chemo. My chemo is preventative and low-level enough to cause thinning of my hair rather than losing loads. At first my hair was knotting as if I were a long-haired dog shedding. However, I was told that I should be using baby shampoo on my hair to treat it more gently. Sure enough it works wonders and now I am back to normal.

What is amusing me is that I am growing hair all over my face. I have this black peach-fuzz (think teenager facial) growing in places that I have never had hair before. I used to only really grow hair in a goatee style round my mouth. The rest of my face never grew any hair at all. Now I have hair all over my cheeks (black) and hair is now growing on my forehead connecting my head hair to my eye-brows.

I find this most amusing…

Would you be surprised to hear that “Werewolves of London” has always been a fave track of mine?

Oh yea and my nickname online is Lagwolf. It was a bit of double entendre…Latency=lag in the online terms as well as a Latent wolf being another term for a lycanthrope.

I was shocked to find Lagwolf.com was available. So I now have it as a url.

Is March; so I am a bit late in telling you. However that does not mean its not a timely reminder to get your colon checked out. As you know having a colonoscopy saved my life. Isn’t it about time that you had yours checked too? Check out the Prevent Cancer Foundation for details on how to go about it.

They have reduced two of my chemo by 20% and boy has it had an impact. No longer do I look like I am an extra in disease horror film; I now look like a teenager with dodgy skin in a John Hughes film. Alas the cysts that hurts the most, ie the ones on the back end, have cleared up theleast. But at least my front dangly bits no longer feel like I have stuck it in hot sauce for a bet. I am also quite a bit perkier now; even on my second day of heavy chemo/pump. I was much better yesterday; especially once I got unhooked from my fanny chemo pack. I have been writing a decent bit connected to the pump…that says alot.

Still on the steroids but I have been informed that I can take em’ breakfast and lunch rather than breakfast and dinner. This will hopefully mean my sleep pattern will not be as buggered up as it has been in the post-chemo days.

Its very good that the trial doctors are so reactive to my particular reactions. It gives me a great sense of relief and belief in them. Kim & I took them chocolates last time we visited the doc.

Last my good wife and I attempted to try another brand of wholewheat pasta to see what its like. We like pasta and are trying to find a healthy alternative to semolina. We are still regretting the decision. The stuff tasted like it was picked up off the dirt and it didn’t have a very good effect on either of our stomachs. Why do some health food manufacturers seem to think that being healthy means you have to suffer? This is not the first time I have tried a wholewheat something that was about as vile as it could be.

I have to say that supermarkets in the US are far better at catering to healthy alternatives that in the UK. Even in the biggest supermarket in the UK the choices are limited and unimaginative. What I am most perturbed by is the lack of decent non-white bread here in the UK. You have choice of bog standard stuff or odd harsh ones; no decent pumpernickel or rye to be had.

The alternative is to go into those wonderful healthfood stores. You know the ones staffed by people with dubious cleaning habits lathered up with cheap patouli. These places spend more time going on about how “right-on” they are than actually stocking anything interesting.

Is it any wonder why people go back to bad habits when being healthy is such a pain?

And today I mean that quite literally.

If you think that socialised medicine is a good idea; then you might want to check out this short film about a Canadian suffering from a rare brain disease. Then again if you live in Maine you are probably aware of all the Canucks who end up in Maine hospitals when they need treatment quickly.

Hat tip: Steve at ASI.

I’ve read another article today about bad nursing care and cleanliness in one NHS hospital Bath’s Royal United Hospital . Lord Mancroft was appalled at the dirty wards and poor nursing care. However, he did have a choice as he was swiftly transferred to a private hospital, lucky him…

read more | digg story

Simon Heffer has some interesting comments on Tory plans to pump money into the NHS.

I have been a bit weak on writing on here of the last few days thanks to a few factors. First of all it has been determined that one of the forms of chemo I am having needs to be toned down a bit. I have a rather bothersome sore bits anywhere on my body that gets “moist”. Had to see the doctor before my antibodies on Wednesday which made for a rather long day that took quite a bit out of me. After I got home on the Wednesday I made my best efforts to relax and rest up so I was up for attending the Die So Fluid CD launch last night. I have known Grog and Co. since their first CD. I know they give a cracking show; so I thought it was apt for me to return to gig attending after my cancer with a trip to see em’.

It was a great night and I took along a good contingent including Kim, her brother Perry “This is England” Benson and a couple who are dear friends. We had a great time with a cracking performance, burlesque acts and some DSF videos. Marty will be reviewing the gig for Blogcritics.com later today or tomorrow. I have pictures as well.

I shall endeavor to get up the latest Carnival of the Vanities today as well.

Some young idiots can’t handle their booze we all know this. The solution is to arrest these oiks and chuck the book at them. The solution is not to screw over all the reasonable drinkers by raising the price of booze even more (like most of it isn’t tax already) as Gordon Browns sees to be planning. Collective punishment is immoral and against natural justice.

Speaking of this sort of thing Martin McGuinness has criticised Eastenders and Coronation Street not for being badly written bilge but for the fact they are set in pubs. Rather ironic this coming from an Irishman don’t you think? Granted his IRA buddies (or former buddies) seemed to like blowing them up so it probably should come as no shock.

Its not much but I got some good news yesterday at my fortnightly checkup with the cancer doctor. I am now taking the one pill I take every day instead of two. The next time the dosage changes it will be to end it. The wonderful “rash” that looks like puberty gone mad is spreading bit by bit. It will continue the entire course of my antibodies and will take up two months to be clear after I finish my chemo.

Both Kim and I are continuing to work on our “cancer book.” Its coming together nicely.

So far my only side affect of the chemo is from the antibodies that I am getting every week. Its a rather visual side affect that generally is just a nuisance and doesn’t really hurt except in the sensitive bits its ended up finding to occupy.

You can use this picture to scare children if they misbehave.

One of the side-affects I warned about with the antibodies I am getting with chemo is spots (aka pimples in the US). I was not shocked that I got quite a bit patch of them. However what I was not warned about what the fact that I might have gotten pimples on my penis. And yes they really bloody hurt. Its all part of making the odds better than I don’t get cancer again…but…damn it!

On the writing front I have produced yet another chapter of the cancer book. I hope to do another one by the end of the weekend. Sitting up is good for me as it hurts less down there.

Last night Kim and I went out socially for the first time since my operation. One could argue that it was pretty much a “normal” evening in London town. We met up with Devil’s Kitchen in pub filled with coppers down for a march. We had a nice couple of beers while chatting about politics and his new designs for our blog(s).

It was then off to meet up with James, my best man, at the Commonwealth Club for dinner. I have to admit at the end of the evening I was slightly more tired than I would normally be but rather pleased. This morning I woke up feeling perfectly fine. So I hope that this is portend for the “off weeks” in the fortnightly course of treatment. If you are a friend in London realise that its unlikely I will be up to much on the week where I have three days of chemo.

Well one of the side-effects of the chemo/antibody trial has certainly made itself obvious quickly. My skin has returned to its erupting self last seen in Miami when I was in my teens. Although it has to be said that if this is the worst side affect I suffer from then it will be pretty decent. Still it was quite impressive how quickly my complexion went downhill from the first time I was given the antibodies last week. I get them every week so I can expect more of this I guess.

The chemo process lasted three days; two hospital visits and one in home visit to detach my pump. After that I have been on steroids until tomorrow. Next week it will be a slightly easier one with only one short visit to the hospital for antibodies. I am writing the cancer book as and when I get the energy up. The steroids seem to drain me a bit rather than giving me “rage.”

I got 12 more of these cycles to go through (for a total of 24 weeks). I got through the first one though fairly well.

After much toing and froing plus a trip to make a donation at the sperm bank I am off for my first chemo session today. Its suitably grey and drizzly here in (outer) London town. I was just amusing myself in the bath realising that I have returned to using “water wings” this time its only one to cover my PICC line so it does not get wet. Its not a very rock & roll colour ether being baby blue.

I have yet to continue my cancer book; but plan to this week. The jar attached to my side will, I am sure, focus my mind on the subject.

As I prepare myself for chemo on Monday; after quite a painless insertion of my PICC line on Friday, I realised I had not written about my writing about the cancer. The Doctor who put it in even made sure it was out of the way so my writing would not be impaired. I can even play guitar.

I have written the introduction and the first chapter of the book. Now that I have done my column for the week I am planning to write some more this weekend. I am just writing the bits I remember from the various phases of the whole thing. Kim will add her bits, ie what actually happened, once I am done. It seems to be flowing fairly well for both of us.

Kim has rather good reason for not writing that much so far. She has not only has been hitting the audition trail for various TV gigs; but she filmed an advert this week as well. I will never begrudge her the acting side of her life and I take pains to encourage it.

In the end I am rather fortunate that both writing and listening to review music is something that I will be able to do fairly well during chemo. I am going to do my best to make sure that besides the time to have the chemo; I am going to make sure it is as little a nuisance as possible.

The Royal Marsden is currently on fire. Patients are being seen to on the street on mattresses. The roof is the part of the building that is on fire. 75 firefighters are on scene at the moment. I know several people who have been treated there; so this is of great concern.

Its been an interesting year for me with both great highs and lows, what with getting married in May; having a great Honeymoon in Cancun complete with tropical storm. But alas, things got rather dire in the last quarter of the year when i was diagnosed with colon cancer and had post operative complications that almost killed me. You may think I am being melodramatic maybe? You will be able to decide when you read my account of it all which I am planning to write in 2008.

British politics were depressing as hell this year with the Conservatives doing their best to completely distance themselves from anything that could resemble being a Conservative. They have become, thanks to Cameron and Zak, fully paid up members of the Gore cult. The fact that the chief priest of this cult has never voted Conservative; instead voting for quasi-marxists Green, and now has a seat is beyond parody.

Now I have to say that the panic in the Lib-Dems was rather fun to watch. It was especially amusing when there was a poll that suggested the Lib-Dems would have no MPs after the next election. It was not long after that when they ditched the ole man and had a new leadership contest. Of course, they have a new leader now who managed a majority of 500+. Not exactly a blistering endorsement eh?

Brown has just admitted that the British economy might have a few problems in the next year. No kidding there mate? What tipped you off?

Now American politics are getting really interesting for those of us interested in such things. Its a dead heat in Iowa for the Dems and pretty durn close for the Republicans as well. Anyone who is completely sure who is going to get the nominations for either party is talking out of their hats. What is making it even more interesting, except maybe in Iowa, is the death of Benazir Bhutto. Foreign policy has been blown up to the top of the issues. Experience is going to be more important in the campaign; which will hurt the Democrats and some Republican candidates quite a bit.

The person I most admire in 2007 is John Smeaton; the man who rose to the challenge and kicked Islamist terrorist arse. He is an inspiration to us all that one man can make a difference in the fight against terrorism.

In 2008 I plan to produce more music, learn to play the acoustic guitar, get through the chemo and release an EP with my wife.

As you may or may not already be aware, members of the Watcher’s Council hold a vote every week on what they consider to be the most link-worthy pieces of writing around… per the Watcher’s instructions, I am submitting one of my own posts for consideration in the upcoming nominations process.

Here is the most recent winning council post, here is the most recent winning non-council post, here is the list of results for the latest vote, and here is the initial posting of all the nominees that were voted on.

Besides going through chemo for the next six months to hopefully prevent a repeat of my colon cancer I plan to use my time to do creative things in the forthcoming months. My first task is to write a book about my experience of getting cancer and the resulting surgery plus post-complications. Hopefully it will be cathartic and help me to fill in some of the blanks from those 14 days in hospital. I rather hope it might raise some money as well; as my costs were somewhat substantial especially as I had no US medical insurance and am now going to be in debt for some time. Should you be moved at any time to donate to the cause of my medical expenses I would be most appreciative.

Other than that I plan to teach myself guitar with the help of my DVD instructor. Might as well use the time mostly stuck at home for something useful and creative eh?

Yet another bit of reasoning why my UK based blogging colleagues and friends universally said I was “lucky” to have had cancer in Maine instead of here in London. It seems that the UK has the worse survival rates for cancer anywhere in Europe. From what I understand the real trouble is that it takes so long to have your cancer diagnosed here in the UK that it is normally too late by the time they find out what is wrong with you.

Now I know that less than a week, which is how long it took my doctors, is probably quick even for the US. It is such a shame that such an advanced country as the UK cannot do better when it comes to finding cancer in its citizens.

We haven’t had time to even write the music for this. However this is the first draft of the song I wrote upon hearing I had colon cancer. My lovely wife Kim co-wrote edited and improved the lines.

Stalking Me
[Dodge/Dodge]

1)

Big C is after me
Not what you think
Nothing I did wrong
In me, it dont belong.

2)

Not Charlie or crack
No artificial means
For this attack
Here to end my dreams.

3)

Talking about the cancer
Thats the fact of the matter
It doesnt know class
Nor evil nor good

4)

Its a battle against the clock
For my ability to rock
A battle against the clock
So that I can rock.

After a battery of tests, and at least one re-test today, I have been given the all clear on all the rest of the bits in me. I even managed to have a healthy liver and lungs. Some of pondered that my illness is down to unhealthy living; even family members. However my surgeon is keen to let me know that its family history or genes that are the reason I have colon cancer at 39. I like to think that the reason I have it at 39 instead of in my 40s because, as always, I am an early achiever. Lets hope that we can manage to get rid of the little bastard, Red Ken, in early November.

I plan to keep a diary of my progress and experience. I am actually feeling better after my bleeding episode and colonoscopy than I have in many months. My stomach and lower bits feel fine.

I have been going on about Subway to my friends for many a moon. Its a very easy thing for me as I rather loath fast food of any kind; but most especially burgers. If I want to get something fast and safe; I always try to hit Subway. The last time I went one was before a gig at the Hammersmith Apollo in London. There is nothing that quick that can really touch it in my humble opinion.

Fresh bread some cheese and some fillings work fine to fill that hole that exists in my stomach when I am hungry. Its not really expensive either which is another good thing when you are trying to keep costs down on a night out in London.

Here in the US they have launched a new rather amusing site mocking burger places and contrasting them to Subway. I quite like the cravat (aka ascot in the US) and black velvet jacket combo of the bloke involved. Would it surprise anyone to know I have both such items in my closet?

Healthy eating is always a good thing, helps prevent things like my colon cancer, and to be able to get decent food quick and cheaply is such a relief. Subways campaign is amusing and poignant even though I need no convincing.